A Love Unspoken
by Swimming the Same Deep Waters
Summary: Set after Last Sacrifice, Rose and Dimitri are Guardians and out as a couple when they return to visit St. Vladimir's. While they are there, Rose learns more about Alberta - and the debt they owe their stalwart colleague. How did such a promising Guardian end up at an Academy, and does Alberta have her own tale of young love and heartbreak? Rated M due to mild adult themes.
So it had taken a while, but once I was cleared of Tatiana's murder, and assigned to be Lissa's Guardian, life finally seemed to be back on track. That's not to say life was suddenly easy...

Dimitri and I were now (mostly) out as a couple – with rather mixed reactions. Our friends were already across the idea of us as an item, so our couple 'coming out' caused minimal fuss with them. Everyone was happy for us, although a few of the guys like to try and get under Dimitri's famous self-control by making lewd jokes or comments.

For example, early on during an off-duty night out to a tavern with guardian friends, Eddie interrupted a private moment between Dimitri and I to ask "Guardian Belikov? Guardian Hathaway seems to be indisposed? I see you're administering mouth-to-mouth. You must be tiring – shall I take over?!" Dimitri was not amused. However everyone else, myself included, found it uproariously funny!

However, not everyone was so kindly disposed. While, for the most part, Moroi at Court either ignored us, considering any Guardian beneath their attention - or at the worst made us the subject of titillating gossip - several court Royals were outraged that two Dhampir were openly seeing one another. In her capacity as Queen, Lissa had endured a number of visits to her office by scandalized members of the Moroi elite, loudly voicing their disapproval. After murmuring platitudes through three or four such visits, Lissa finally snapped – telling the most recent visitor that she "Didn't see what the big deal was," and that if morality was such an issue, perhaps she needed to "look into everyone's youthful dalliances a little more closely."

While that did relegate my relationship with Dimitri to a mere 'youthful dally,' given the Moroi Royal in question had an illegitimate Dhampir child in almost every grade at St. Vladimir's, once word got around about Lissa's stance, the open opposition to our relationship diminished substantially.

That said, a lot of opposition was more subtle. While Dimitri was assigned to guard Christian, and I Lissa, Guardian Hans Croft was still in charge of arranging our shifts. Along with making numerous sardonic comments, he seemed to take inordinate pleasure in appointing Dimitri and me to work opposing shifts. Even when we did have a shift off together, there was always a special assignment or extra training which required one or the other of us. For a while, it was like we were in a relationship in name only, as we barely ever saw one another! After a pointed word from a couple of the other senior guardians, he did ease off a little. But we were still on his shit list, and he spared no opportunity to let both of us know it.

Even though the rest of the guardians were largely supportive (or just hated Hans more than they disliked the idea of two Guardians together), it made for some tense times. Eventually, Lissa stepped in – deciding that a fortnight's visit to St. Vladamir's was in order; putting us temporarily out of Hans' domain.

If I'd thought Hans' reaction to our relationship was over the top, it was nothing compared to the reaction we encountered at St. Vladamir's. Alberta was nothing short of delighted! She was publically and privately very supportive of Dimitri and I. In fact, for the first forty-eight hours we were there, she'd rostered us to review the school's 'Summer operational plan.' Citing our need for absolute concentration in doing so, she'd allocated us to stay in one of the most secluded outer cabins on campus, stocking it with wine and delicious foods, banning anyone from visiting us for the duration.

An in-joke amongst senior Guardians, the 'summer operational plan' was a 3-line document outlining the approved activities for any Moroi student staying at the academy over the long summer break. Since Moroi students never remained over summer, reviewing the plan was a sneaky admin technique to give a break for any guardian deemed deserving of an extra day or two off. Everyone knew this, and so when we rejoined the rest of the team on day three, we endured questions like "Are we adequately prepared for summer, Guardian Hathaway? I hope you were thorough in going over the plan?!" While I found the funny side of these comments, in truth, the most amusing aspect was watching Dimitri squirm and try to maintain his impassive guardian façade as people openly teased about our amorous time together.

Altogether it was Stan's reaction that was the most surprising. Guardian Alto and I had had a love-hate relationship when we were student and teacher. We'd loved to hate one another. I'd lost count of the number of times Stan had thrown me out of his classroom or sent me off on two-hour jogs around campus in the pouring rain. However now I was a qualified Guardian assigned to our Queen, and partner to Dimitri, he was friendly. Over friendly, in fact. And it was disturbing! Sitting with the crew at the senior Guardian table in the cafeteria, Stan had started reminiscing about when we were 'all on campus together.' The way he told it, we were all the best of friends and confidants. Truly weird, and a bit gross! I found it unnerving, although Dimitri seemed mildly amused by the whole thing.

My family was slowly coming around to the idea of things, too. Abe was pretty low key about the whole arrangement. I know he'd had a conversation with Dimitri about 'expectations for his girl,' but from what Dimitri recounted, it wasn't too over the top. Honestly, while Abe had a bad-ass scary demeanor, I couldn't help but wonder if he was at least a little perturbed by my Russian boyfriend, who stood at least half a foot taller than he did!

Mom was also starting to accept us. While she was still funny about the whole Guardian and Guardian thing, on a personal level she liked Dimitri and provided we didn't discuss work or Guardian duties, she was happy to recognize him as my partner.

In fact, the second week at St. Vladamir's, she surprised us with a visit. She had some business at the school she wanted to attend to and knowing we were there decided to coincide her visit with ours. It was good to see her, and it was also nice for her to spend some time with Dimitri and me together as a couple when we were off-duty.

A couple of days before we were due to return to court, I went to Mom's dorm room for pizza and a chat. Dimitri was on duty with Lissa and Christian at a school dinner, but I had been given the shift off. Since Mom was also unallocated that evening, we arranged to meet and hang out. Hanging out was not something that came naturally to Mom and me, so I thought to aid the situation by bringing along a couple of bottles of Sauvignon Blanc to share. Putting the radio on to some boppy tunes, Mom and I ate slices and opened a bottle.

Now we were spending time together I was finding it easier to talk with her. She'd even been able to give me well-meaning advice a couple of times without it irritating the hell out of me! And I had to admit after so long not liking each other, it was nice to be coming to a better phase in our relationship. She was telling me all about her most recent assignment, and I caught her up on what was going on at court. Opening our second bottle of wine, we moved on to St. Vladamir's gossip.

I told her about Stan's altered opinion of me, now I was a Guardian and Dimitri's.

"I can't believe the way he talks! It's as if we were all some big happy Guardian family" I whined. "It so didn't happen that way. It's just creepy!"

"I think Dimitri might have had a little chat with Guardian Alto about his attitude towards you," Mom giggled. "Way I heard it, Dimitri told Stan to put up or shut up," she continued.

"Ughhhh! I'm going to kill Dimitri! No wonder Stan's walking on eggshells around me!" I groaned, quickly wondering who else Dimitri might have 'spoken' with. Although - I did have to own a perverse pleasure imagining Dimitri putting Stan in his place. That was one conversation I wish I'd been a fly on the wall for.

"Alberta's been wonderful," I continued. "She's always liked Dimitri, of course, but she seems genuinely happy for us."

"Yes. Well, it makes sense she'd be a champion of young love given her own history, I suppose" Mom commented innocuously, taking another bite from her pizza and following it with a glug of wine.

"Her background?!" I asked, trying and failing to imagine Alberta as the ingénue in a youthful love affair.

"Honestly, Rosemarie!" Mom blustered "We weren't all born over the age of forty, you know! We were all young once, too."

Heading her off before she started in on one of her tirades, I quickly interjected "Yes, I know, Mom. I just can't imagine Alberta at the center of a love affair."

On the shorter side for a Dhampir, with salt and pepper gray hair worn in a short cut to display her promise and molnija marks, Alberta was the very picture of Guardian fairness, duty, and efficiency. She was also a genuinely pleasant woman who cared about her colleagues and students. But she didn't exactly make one think hot steamy romance.

"Well it was a big deal at the time, apparently," Mom continued, munching at her pizza, "although everyone involved did their best to keep it quiet. Alberta's older than me, so I wasn't in the senior school when it all happened. But it was still whispered about, even years later."

I nodded – taking a sip of wine, and eagerly nodding for her to continue.

"I can't remember all the particulars," Mom continued thoughtfully "but I am pretty sure she was in her final year as a novice. It was a different time back then," she mused. "Moroi and Dhampir women rarely continued into the senior years at school, and those who did were usually trained for administrative responsibilities. Alberta was one of only a handful of female Dhampirs training for active Guardian duty. She was also very academic – taking the advanced classes alongside Moroi students. Everyone had such high hopes for her."

"So what happened?" I asked, my curiosity piqued.

"Well back then there weren't enough female Dhampir to require a separate dormitory," Mom started to explain.

"What?" I interrupted "They had male and female novices in the same dorm blocks? Were they sharing ROOMS?" I asked, truly scandalized.

"Of course not!" Mom answered in exasperation. "The female novices shared with Moroi. Female Moroi," she clarified. "It wasn't a big deal," she continued peevishly. "It was just the way it was back then. I shared rooms with Moroi girls in my lower years here. The Dhampir women's dorm was only finished a few years before I graduated, you know!"

Wow. I'd had no idea. I mean, I knew that in years gone by the dorm rooms were doubles and students had shared. I'd just never thought it would be Moroi and Dhampir sharing. Thinking more about it, though, it made sense. The Dhampir dorm rooms, where Mom and I were sitting now, were all single rooms and tiny. No way you could have fitted a second bed in these rooms.

"They moved the Dhampir into these dog boxes," she went on, correctly guessing the direction of my thoughts "and gave Moroi students a large room to themselves in the old wing."

"Well, I guess that explains why Lissa's rooms have always been three times the size of mine," I muttered, taking a big gulp of wine and feeling a little cross. "So about Alberta..." I redirected.

"Yes. Alberta shared with the daughter of a high-ranking royal Moroi. She was being trained for a diplomatic role at court. Quite an unusual thing for a woman in those days. Anyway, she and Alberta were the best of friends. Inseparable. They went everywhere and did everything together. Everyone assumed that once they graduated and she headed to court that Alberta would be her Guardian."

"So what happened?" I probed.

"Well it was an ugly business, and nothing was ever proven," Mom prevaricated hesitantly.

With a pointed look from me, she sighed "But the rumors say that one evening she and Alberta were discovered in a compromising situation."

"Compromising? Compromising how exactly?" I asked, not following. "What had they done?"

"Compromising, Rosemarie. Romantically!"

"Oh!" I gasped, it suddenly all becoming clear.

"If the rumors are true, they were discovered naked in bed together, the Moroi feeding from Alberta," Mom said in an uncertain voice. "It was kept very hush-hush," Mom persisted, slowly revealing each tidbit of information now she'd made her meaning clear, "but Alberta's career was ruined all the same. She graduated top of her class with some of the highest academic and training scores the academy had ever seen but was never assigned to guard a Moroi. Instead, she was assigned to teaching duties."

"She must have been devastated," I mused. "It's so unfair! What happened to her friend? The Moroi?"

"She went to court, of course," Mom laughed bitterly. "Was very successful there, by all accounts."

"Is she still there? Would I know her?" I asked, refilling our glasses with more wine.

"Oh you knew her, all right," Mom answered. "It was Priscilla Voda!"

"Princess Voda?" I gasped, my eyes bulging. "No! Oh my God, I had no idea!"

"Very few people outside of the academy did," Mom assured me.

"Oh my GOD! Does that mean Queen Tatiana and Princess Voda..." I started.

"I don't think so" Mom replied. "Tatiana had too much of a taste for toy boys." I nodded, thinking of Ambrose. "I think they were just good friends. And no matter what else, Priscilla was an amazing political adviser. I'm pretty sure after it all blew up, and they were separated, Alberta threw herself into her work as Priscilla did with hers. I know they didn't continue with their relationship, and I don't think either of them found anyone else."

My mind was reeling. It could explain a lot about Voda's open opposition of my friendship with Lissa. Having been best friends forever, and being shadow -kissed, we were very close. Not in that way though! I wonder if that's why Tatiana hated me so much, too? Although dating Adrian probably hadn't helped my cause either!

My mind was running overtime, considering all the potential implications of this new information. I nearly didn't twig when Mom continued "That's why the older Guardians understood when Alberta took a few days off after Princess Voda was killed."

"When she was..." I started. And the penny dropped. Priscilla Voda was killed on Lissa's 18th birthday in a Strigoi attack. A Strigoi attack led by Dimitri when he was undead!

I gasped. "Does Dimitri know? About Alberta and Priscilla?"

"No," Mom said quickly. "I've known Alberta for thirty-five years. Worked alongside her for a good number of them, and never once have I known her to speak of this. To anyone. In fact, I wasn't entirely sure it wasn't all just a silly rumor until last year."

Taking a mouthful of wine, she continued. "Alberta called me not long after Dimitri was restored. She told me about his inability to forgive himself for the things he'd done while he was Strigoi. He was racked with guilt, and she was really worried about him, but also about you. She could see you were falling apart without him. She rang to suggest you might need your mother," Mom looked at me lovingly.

"She didn't blame Dimitri? For Princess Voda I mean? He led the attack in which she was killed to kidnap Lissa and Christian."

"No. She said he shouldn't hold himself responsible for things he'd done when he was undead. She was concerned for him. She said she knew firsthand that young love was precious, that everything could change in a moment, and that two hearts shouldn't be separated. She wanted the two of you to cherish every moment of happiness together," Mom said, her eyes suspiciously moist. "So she kept trying to bring him around."

I could feel tears welling up in my eyes, too. I knew Alberta had spent hours talking with Dimitri after he was restored, beseeching him to forgive himself for what he'd done and move on with life. A life with me. Without her help, I doubt he would have found his way back.

I couldn't imagine being so caring and kind hearted towards others had I been in her place. Her dream career snatched from her in an instant, permanently separated from the one she loved by bigotry and stigma, yet she'd managed to go on – selflessly giving her all to her new role. It was so close to how things could have ended for me - and I know I couldn't have handled it with her professionalism and aplomb. She was one of the most generous and kind-hearted people I'd ever known, and I was regretful that I hadn't fully appreciated that until now.

Sharing the last of the second bottle between Mom's glass and mine, I raised mine in a toast "To Guardian Petrov. A magnificent woman who Dimitri and I owe so very much to."

"To Alberta," Mom replied. "A wonderful woman, and a good friend."


End file.
